Soccer Sorcery

Though his stage performances are normally reserved for Spain's World Cup and Euro title celebrations, Liverpool goalkeeper Pepe Reina is the star of Academy Award nominated director Javier Fesser's new comedy short Invictus. In the film, Reina plays a Roman soldier and in the opening scene, he is repeatedly hit in the head with rocks. Much of the 14-minute film's humor is physical, so even if you don't speak Spanish you can still get something out of it. Namely Pepe Reina getting hit in the head with rocks.

Though his stage performances are normally reserved for Spain's World Cup and Euro title celebrations, Liverpool goalkeeper Pepe Reina is the star of Academy Award nominated director Javier Fesser's new comedy short Invictus. In the film, Reina plays a Roman soldier and in the opening scene, he is repeatedly hit in the head with rocks. Much of the 14-minute film's humor is physical, so even if you don't speak Spanish you can still get something out of it. Namely Pepe Reina getting hit in the head with rocks.

For the fourth straight year, Cristiano Ronaldo watched Lionel Messi collect the Ballon d'Or in January . So to remind him of this fact, a group of women from a bakery in Lisbon presented him with a Ballon d'Or made of cake at Portugal's training facility in Obidos. They held up signs and wore special shirts that read "we make your dreams come cake." Which sounds vaguely dirty. Still, it was a lovely gesture to show Cristiano how much he is appreciated in his homeland. And sure, even with the addition of the cake to the real Ballon d'Or Ronaldo won in 2008, Messi still has twice as many. But are any of Messi's edible? No. So when there's an international food shortage we'll see whose collection is more impressive.

You know those times when you go to a store in Germany and you're completely surrounded by packages of underwear with pictures of you on them? I don't just mean the standard couple of racks, I mean completely surrounded. Like, at any moment there could be an avalanche of your own brand of underpants that buries you alive. No? Really? Well, David Beckham does. The same day France Football announced that Beckham is the world's highest earning footballer (even though he's donating his wages from PSG to charity), the 37-year-old presented his line of bodywear for H&M in Berlin. And if that smirk is anything to go by, he doesn't plan on paying for the boxes he already hid under his coat. It was just the latest example of the surreal existence that is David Beckham's daily life. And yes, it included an underwear autographing session... "Here's a box of my underpants. I've signed it, 'To Horst, may you forever enjoy these garments free of wedgies ...

It's only been a couple of months since Nene moved from PSG to Qatari side Al-Gharafa, but he seems to be endearing himself to his new home quite nicely. The Brazilian winger was sent off after a second booking in a cup match against Al-Arabi. Nene argued the decision with the referee and Al-Arabi midfielder Houssine Kharja got between them in an attempt to end the conflict. But Nene didn't appreciate this, so he punched Kharja in the side of the head from behind the Morocco international. That, as you might imagine, started a team-wide scuffle. Kharja then came flying in at Nene with some punches and kicks of his own. Once the most heated parties were separated, an Al-Arabi player was left to get treatment for his bloody face. Since this happened near the end of stoppage time, the final result wasn't impact much by the violence and Al-Arabi won 2-1. This has been the Dirty Tackle of the Day: a chronicling of unfortunate events.

Having dropped from the Premier League last season, Wolverhampton Wanderers now find themselves fighting a second successive relegation in the Championship bottom three. The Midlands side managed a 2-1 victory over Bristol City at Molineux, but goalkeeper Carl Ikeme had a bad day at the office after letting a backpass from defender David Davis slip through his legs. Ikeme didn't play in the second half, but not necessarily because manager Dean Saunders took him out of the game. After the Welsh manager initally claimed the 26-year-old had injured his hand in the opening 45, it has been revealed that he actually punched a tactics board in frustation. Since he is not Zlatan and his bones are not made of steel, he broke his hand. Saunders explained in The Daily Mail : "Carl was frustrated at making his mistake and has punched the tactics board which is only cardboard but there is a metal bar at the back of it which has damaged his hand. He has not meant to break his hand - Kevin D...

Real Madrid manager Jose Mourinho wasnoticeablyabsent from the Ballon d'Or gala in January. Nominated for the World Coach of the Year award along with former Barca manager Pep Guardiola and Spain's Vicente Del Bosque (who ended up winning it), Mourinho now claims that he didn't attend the ceremony because he was informed of a sinister conspiracy against him. From Reuters : "Am I sorry for not having gone to the gala? No. It was the right decision," Mourinho told RTP television on Tuesday in excerpts from an interview. "One, two or three people called me saying they had voted for me but the vote showed up as cast for somebody else. So, I decided not to go," he said. The Portuguese coach and former Barcelona boss Pep Guardiola lost the 2012 FIFA coach award to Spain's Vicente del Bosque at January's gala. FIFA said in a statement: "FIFA confirms that the list of votes published on FIFA.com is accurate." Of course, Mourinho, who previously...