Dimitar Berbatov is...The Continental

Well hello there.

I see you've held me sitting upon a dais as well as wondering because Wayne Rooney is so bad during doing everything. Ha-HA! His penalty kick opposite Arsenal was even more of a fantastic failure than a time my cousin Timitar as well as we walked around Manchester posing as hoop skirt inspectors. Ha-HA! But seriously, my cousin Timitar as well as we unequivocally are hoop skirt inspectors, so greatfully go forward as well as take off your- ... You're not going to take off anything? OK, then. I'll ask again in a few minutes.

Perhaps you're wondering because we didn't fool around in Manchester United's very critical compare opposite Arsenal. ... Well, I'll tell we anyway. Earlier in a day, as we focused my erotic will upon continuing to be a club's greatest scorer of all time as well as filled my gloves with mayonnaise, Sir Alex Ferguson approached me as well as said, "Berba, your value is unmatched as well as we smell zero similar to marred divert as well as goat hair. Please forgive me, though we must dais we so Arsenal have a sporting possibility as well as Rooney won't be intimidated by your formidable as well as sexy presence. Also, we unequivocally don't smell similar to marred divert as well as goat hair."

So, my great crony Park Ji-sung (which translates to "Asian Berba") scored a fanciful idea which we taught him, Rooney continued to be not great as well as Manchester United won yet again. Ha-HA! Excuse me a moment while we instruct a immature male sitting next to me whom we have never seen before in my life to remind Chicharito a.k.a. Little Berba to encounter me in a woods after for a celebratory Berba-buffett which will include several kinds of jelly as well as may be a little squirrel meat. ... Now, how about letting me inspect your underwear?

Oh-OHHH!! we cons ider we just got hit in a face by an erring Wayne Rooney penalty kick! Oh, which hurts so much! Why did feel a need to kick it so hard as well as so distant divided from a goal?! Oh, I'm not even hungry anymore for which delicious Berba-buffett in a woods! All which squirrel beef will surely go to waste! Oh, it unequivocally is astonishing how bad which man is.

Join us again next time for an additional chapter in a life of...The Continental...

Photo: Getty Images

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