Random musings of footballers before they fall asleep...

Vladimir Putin

Putin World Cup is starting to be spectacular. ... Heh heh heh. ... Every compare will begin with Putin judo fighting a small child as well as interpretation with Putin fishing shirtless. ... we will fool around matches for whatever teams we wish as well as we will not promise to wear a shirt as we do so. ... Heh heh heh. ... Abramovich improved be listening. Is Abramovich listening? ... Yes, he is listening. ... Heh heh heh. ... Putin World Cup will additionally embody bear attacks that we will fight off with my Telekinetic powers. ... All matches will be promote to a world after Putin edits have taken place as well as newspapers will only be allowed to publish compare reports that discuss it of Putin power. ... Yes, Putin World Cup will be fantastic joy for Putin as well as Putin alone. ... Heh heh heh. ... Now where is Arshavin? That guy creeps me out...

{yps:more}

Raul

Ugh, we consider we ate as well most candy. I've got cherry stuff leaking from my mouth. ... Wait. ... That's not cherry stuff -- that's blood. ... we do not know what caused this, though it substantially means I'm dying. ... This is bad. ... we do not wish to die playing for a team only outward a relegation zone. ... we bet Florentino did this. He's substantially hiding in a stands somewhere with a sniper purloin while Karim Benzema giggles similar to a tween. ... we can see a light. ... And Klaas, my old teammate from Real is here. ... we consider we can hear a voice. ... It's saying- ... It's saying- ... It's saying Florentino Perez is an assface...

Theo Walcott

I feel similar to an old person. ... Arsene must never know...

Euro 2012 Mascots

NOW WE HAVE NAMES AND OUR POWER IS STRONGER -- WHEN YOUR SOUL IS BARBEQUED OVER A PIT OF TORMENT YOU WILL KNOW IT WAS SLAVEK AND SLAVKO

Didier Drogba

Time for a disgraces. ... First, this happened to me in my stately return to Marseille. That's a disrespectful f***ing disgrace. ... Then, Chelsea lost. Again. That's an insanely frustrating f***ing disgrace. ... Then, Kalou's back end was exposed during one point. That was an nonessential f***ing disgrace. ... Then, Kitier Katba pawed during a design of a custom made cat jacuzzi similar to that's what he wants for Christmas. That's an opulent f***ing disgrace. ... Then, there are those horrible neon green kits we had to wear. That's an extremely ugly f***ing disgrace. ... Then, there were those times those dual bald referees who substantially melt toys in front of without a country kids cheated us out of a Champions League. That...that was a...

Photos:Reuters, Guardian/Tom Jenkins AP

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