St. Pauli's newest player is the club's press officer

Pictured: St. Pauli's accounting division.

St. Pauli are in a bit of a predicament at the moment. A rash of injuries have left them thin in defense and desperate for people they can put in a kit. So, instead of making an unsigned and desperate footballer's dream come true, they've decided to look within the club for someone they can put in the squad for Saturday's match against Hannover 96. More specifically, they decided to look at their media department.

From the Guardian:

Hauke Brckner, 30, who works as a press officer for the alternative Hamburg club and has played for the Under-23 team, received a call from the coach, Holger Stanislawski, who told him to turn up at training "in one hour".

"Against Hannover we only have four fit defenders so it makes sense to bring in Hauke," Stanislawski said.

Brckner, who played 10 games in Germany's second division in the 2002-03 season, said his new team-mates were surprised to see him.

"When I walked into the changing room with my bag, the boys were staring at me, not really believing it," Brckner said. "They did crack some jokes but I know them well and after that everything was good."

Well, not only is this story already in pre-production at Disney, but if Bruckner does well, it could start a new trend. Don't be surprised if Arsenal turn to their stadium tour guides to fill their injury holes.

Photo: AP